Are you a bad person? Do you smell? Have you ever tried to run from the cops? I think duct tape can cure you of all these problems. Duct tape is freakin insane. You can hold just about anything together to form anything you want. Want a car? Bam. Want a girlfriend? Bam. I believe in the next five years we will depend on duct tape instead of crude oil. Screw crude oil. It's all up in your face with high prices and it feels like slime. Duct tape is silver, which is a cool color. You can even customize it to the color of your liking. Can crude oil do that? No.
So Jack (not my camera), the goose at my campus was being a dick today. That school girl was up on the highest part of the II building talking so much shit. I was about to throw a rock at it to stfu. Honestly, he thought he was tough shit. He wouldn't stop calling me fat, and telling the smokers to stop smoking. Asshole. If he decides to come down tomorrow I might have to kick his ass. It's for his own good, don't yell at me animal activists. kthx.
Do you ever feel like someone is hiding in your house? I sure do. I have to turn the lights on when I'm alone so I don't crawl in a corner and cry myself to sleep at night. Also when I go to the bathroom I check behind the shower curtain to make sure noones hiding behind there to ambush me when I'm taking a piss. Actually, sometimes when I pass by my bathroom I'll randomly check behind the curtain. Everytime I feel something. Before I take a shower in the morning I always check behind the curtain. Right when I get home from class I check the curtain. I'm starting to think I should just not close the curtain when I'm done in the shower. That would be rude though, ladies might get mad if they see how un-civil I live. I don't want that to happen.
brb, checking curtain.
I want glasses. They're so cool. My buddy has glasses and he's a player now. It's time I get glasses. Yeah, I have 20/20 vision ( word up yo ) and eagles have a hard time beating me in a distance contest but I just want some to wear. They have to be sweet. Bars up your vision, taking your field of view away. I bet you could pretend the frames were like a space ship and when you walk around outside you can make it the spaceship do tricks and stuff. OR you can imagine the frames are a huge brick wall and just watch traffic SLAM into your huge brick wall but they're really frames on your sweet glasses so noone gets hurt. Thank god.
Anyways, Justin Timberlake stole my body shots again and pasted his face on my bod. Asshole. I need to go kick his ass, brb.
OK that was fast, he's a panzy.
Favorite pickup line this week: "wow."
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